| How To Help If you know a girl who is or could be in an abusive relationship, talk to her in a caring way. Here are suggestions for being helpful and supportive. For Parents: Don't Go on the Offensive When it comes to talking about your daughter's boyfriend, don't attack him with words. Calling him a creep or a jerk won't help your daughter understand your point of view. Don't give her ultimatums or insist that she has to break up with him, either. These behaviors will only push her closer to her boyfriend and further away from you. She may feel that she has to "rescue" him, and that you just don't understand him. Teach Love as a Behavior Start talking to your daughter about love as a behavior, rather than a feeling. You can point out behaviors that you see on his part: he calls her names, he cheats on her, he lies to her. Ask if she considers those behaviors as loving and caring. Doing so opens up her mind, helping her to make good decisions. Your Last Resort In some cases, legal intervention may be needed. Although each state has different laws, temporary restraining orders are available in most states. These laws will keep the abusive boyfriend from having contact with your daughter. The Southwest Crisis Center can help you obtain a restraining order and help with advice to help you and your daughter. For Friends: Don't Let Go Don't ask your friend to choose between her boyfriend and your friendship. Keep the lines of communication open with the abused friend, and let her know that you are always there to talk. Don't let the abuser isolate her from your friendship. Above all, remain in contact with your friend. She may need more help than you know. Tell her it's not her fault & they don't deserve it. Don't spread gossip and try to get information of abusive relationships for your friend. |
| SOUTHWEST CRISIS CENTER Worthington, Jackson, Pipestone, Luverne and Windom |
| If you need further help please call us on 1-800-376-4311 24 hrs |
